It\’s that time again! Another email from the Messiah! Let’s read it together!
Kevin —
I see my criticism of you hasn\’t made our friendship less deep, as apparently we\’re still on a first name basis.
This is the moment our movement was built for.
We are the change we\’ve been waiting for!! Ooooh lofty phrases and soothingly read teleprompter speak is so motivating!!
For one month, the fight for health insurance reform leaves the backrooms of Washington, D.C., and returns to communities across America.
Didn\’t you promise that the days of backroom legislating was over?? Are you now conceding that it continues and only occasionally takes breaks??
Throughout August, members of Congress are back home, where the hands they shake and the voices they hear will not belong to lobbyists, but to people like you.
They\’ll hear our voices instead of lobbyists?? Well only if we\’re not dressed very nicely because according to Barbara Boxer, you\’re not a grassroots voice if you\’re well dressed. A standard that apparently includes jeans and a polo shirt. But you have to understand that her constiuents are heavily of the Code Pink crowd so her sense of fashion is probably a bit \”off\”.
But it\’s nice to hear they won\’t be listening to lobbyists any more. Although I\’m not sure how that works. After all your administration seems to have hired damn near every lobbyist in Washington. Surely you guys occasionally hold meetings yeah?
Home is where we\’re strongest. We didn\’t win last year\’s election together at a committee hearing in D.C. We won it on the doorsteps and the phone lines, at the softball games and the town meetings, and in every part of this great country where people gather to talk about what matters most.
Well as long as we\’re not talking about all your radical friends. Or your long time racist preacher. Or your vast ties to the corrupt Chicago political machine. Or your lack of experience at…well anything.
And if you\’re willing to step up once again, that\’s exactly where we\’re going to win this historic campaign for the guaranteed, affordable health insurance that every American deserves.
And by \”affordable\” you mean bankrupting the economy. And by \”every American\” you\’re including lots of illegal aliens. And by guaranteed you mean I\’ll take what you give me because I don\’t have a choice anymore. And I noticed you use the term \”health insurance\” rather than \”health care\”. Reason I point that out is \”auto insurance\” doesn\’t do me any good if I can\’t find an auto mechanic. And since your plan seems determined to destroy the health care industry that\’s an important detail.
But heh, at least we agree this is historic. You call it a historic campaign, I call it a historic clusterfuck. You say tomato, I say eggplant.
There are those who profit from the status quo, or see this debate as a political game, and they will stop at nothing to block reform.
I\’m not sure how my friends and neighbors are really profiting from the status quo?? Unless by profit you mean having health insurance choices and being able to pick the one that best fits their family? If that\’s the case, then yeah, we\’re definitely profiting and we\’d prefer it not end.
They are filling the airwaves and the internet with outrageous falsehoods to scare people into opposing change.
Yeah, I can see how free speech would scare you. But I\’m not sure how quoting you and/or the actual text from the legislation is spreading outrageous falsehoods?? Perhaps people have figured out that not all change is good. Because certainly the Hopenchange you delivered so far sucks buffalo chips.
And some people, not surprisingly, are getting pretty nervous.
Well you can\’t blame people for getting nervous. Here we\’ve had the best health care system on the planet, and you\’re out to destroy it.
So we\’ve got to get out there, fight lies with truth, and set the record straight.
Yeah, please tell me how we\’re lying by quoting parts of the legislation. Please set the record straight about how specifically quoting sections of this health care legislation lying.
That\’s why Organizing for America is putting together thousands of events this month where you can reach out to neighbors, show your support, and make certain your members of Congress know that you\’re counting on them to act.
Yeah, because closed scripted \”events\” are more democratic than open non-scripted townhalls.
But these canvasses, town halls, and gatherings only make a difference if you turn up to knock on doors, share your views, and show your support.
Because for some reason the majority of the population thinks their voice should be heard instead of Obama\’s.
So here\’s what I need from you:
Can you sign up to attend an event near you?
I\’m pretty sure they\’d try to arrest me for thought crimes. Besides, haven\’t you already asked people to start informing on each other to the government?
In politics, there\’s a rule that says when you ask people to get involved, always tell them it\’ll be easy. Well, let\’s be honest here: Passing comprehensive health insurance reform will not be easy.
So you finally figured out that just crying out \”Hope\” and \”Change\” doesn\’t actually get things done?? Congrats. Welcome to Earth, although we\’re full so if you could go back home it\’d be appreciated.
Every President since Harry Truman has talked about it, and the most powerful and experienced lobbyists in Washington stand in the way.
How are they in the way?? You hired all of them?? You telling me even your own staff doesn\’t like this health care plan?? Certainly Congress or your family won\’t be subjected to it so I guess they don\’t have to like it. It\’s only for the plebes.
But every day we don\’t act, Americans watch their premiums rise three times faster than wages, small businesses and families are pushed towards bankruptcy, and 14,000 people lose their coverage entirely.
Supporting evidence for ANY of that?? Although I bet one part is right. I bet 14,000 people are losing their coverage because they are losing their jobs in this wonderous economy you\’ve \”stimulated\”.
The cost of inaction is simply too much for the people of this nation to bear.
Yeah, but the cost of your preferred action is FAR too much for ANYTHING to bear. Need I remind you??

And that was BEFORE you came up with this $TRILLION clusterfuck of an idea.
So yes, fixing this crisis will not be easy. Our opponents will attack us every day for daring to try.
To be fair we\’re attacking you because you\’re wrong. But again, tomato vs eggplant.
It will require time, and hard work, and there will be days when we don\’t know if we have anything more to give. But there comes a moment when we all have to choose between doing what\’s easy, and doing what\’s right.
And you\’ve chosen to do neither???
This is one of those times. And moments like this are what this movement was built for. So, are you ready?
This is what the movement was built for? Ohhhhh, I thought it was built for hero worship. My bad.
Please RSVP for an event in your community to build support for health insurance reform:
http://my.barackobama.com/AugustAttend
Which one can I attend to destroy support??
Let\’s seize this moment and win this historic victory for our economy, our health and our families.
Hmmm, this is obviously a definition of victory with which I was previously unfamiliar with. Because otherwise I don\’t understand how bankrupting our economy, destroying my health care, and taking choices away from my family could be construed as \”victory\”. I\’m intriqued by this new language, please educate me in this double plus good speak.
Thank you,
President Barack Obama
No problem Oby