EckerNet.Com

I’m sure most of you have already read about the Larry Craig scandal. For the few cavemen who haven’t I’ll give a brief summary. Basically US Senator Larry Craig got busted in a Minneapolis Airport bathroom for trying to elicit sex from an undercover police officer. His actions included reached with his foot and rubbing the ankle of the officer as well as reaching with his hand underneath the stall wall.

Ok, he pled guilty to a crime that includes behavior that is….well, to put it mildly, less than flattering. He should resign. He’s an embarassment to the Senate, which I might point out is pretty difficult to do. He’s an embarrassment to the party. In short, he’s a tool.

But that’s not why I bring it up. Personally the story was pretty open-and-shut for me, until I paid attention to his explanation of the events.

Craig also told the arresting officer that he reached down with his right hand to pick up a piece of paper that was on the floor.

“It should be noted that there was not a piece of paper on the bathroom floor, nor did Craig pick up a piece of paper,” the arresting officer said in the report.

Ok, we’ve all been in stalls like this before. I’m trying to picture the amazing agile contortions that would be necessary to touch someone’s ankle in the next stall while trying to pick up a paper. Amazing….if Cirque due Soelil ever needs a backup, I imagine Craig’s schedule will be clearing up soon.

Craig stated “that he has a wide stance when going to the bathroom and that his foot may have touched mine,” the report states.

Ok buddy, granted we’ve all been there when things were happening quite as gently as we’d like. But if you need to take that wide of a stance, you need to see a doctor. If you have to use so much leverage your feet are leaving the stall, trust me, this is not something you want to pass on your own.

And surely this man damn well knows that, so the fact that he wants us to believe it demonstrates the highest level of arrogance. Embarrassing and elitist, sounds like a winner. Idaho, you can do better. Put Mr. Potato Head up there, surely even he would be a better Senator.