EckerNet.Com

TO : All Main Stream Media Outlets
FROM : Whoever decides what crap gets put on TV
RE : Sensational Topic For 2007

Ok everyone, it\’s time to get on board with what our sensational overhyped topic of the year is gonna be.  Traditionally, sharks have always served well.  Last year we tried alligators in Florida but it didn\’t work out too well.  Lately we\’ve been pushing this global warming thing, but I think it\’s starting to wear pretty thin.

This should be real easy for you, no reporting or thinking is required.  Just copy and paste the text from these previous topics:

• Shark Attacks
• Alligator attacks
• SARS
• West Nile
• Bird Flu
• Republicans Passing A Draft

These were all good topics, and despite no real danger to more than 0.00002% of the population it kept the entire country scared shitless for a year.  So it\’s material you can just use again, just plug in reference to our new topic….

Ok enough suspense, our topic this year….

Snakes.

For those of you that are really talented is if you can\’t work in a nice seque linking giant killer snakes with the current global warming thing.

Thanks to everyone for your help.

P.S. – Just because you are overhyping snakes doesn\’t mean you can let off on the \”Bush is Hitler\” or \”Republicans Are Evil\” stories.  Granted it\’s not an election year, but it\’s good practice for when it is.