EckerNet.Com

Ever had that neighbor that just never seemed to take care of his property? Sometimes it even got to the point that they left their grass grow so long that the city had to come in and cut it?? Well it seems the federal government has found itself in much the same position.

As immigrants and their supporters prepared for a massive boycott, opponents of illegal immigration went to work building a border fence meant to symbolize their support of a secure border.

About 200 volunteers organized by the Minuteman Civil Defense Corps of California began building a six-foot barbed wire fence Saturday along a quarter-mile stretch of rugged terrain in Boulevard, about 50 miles east of San Diego.

Tim Donnelly, the group’s leader, said volunteers ate apple pie and hot dogs as they worked on the fence, which was connected to an existing 12-foot high fence previously built by the federal government.

Wow…there is enough symbolism in this to choke Ted Kennedya cow. Not only are these private citizens doing the work of the federal government (defending and enforcing our borders) but they do it while eating apple pie and hot dogs. I bet their mothers are even at home sewing a new flag for them.

But really what this comes down to is Congress, the administration and the political parties in general should be ashamed of themselves.

“This was largely sent as a message to Congress so they’ll see on May 1, there are jobs that even illegal immigrants don’t want to do, but Americans are more than willing to do them,” Donnelly said, referring to the fence-building.

Yeah! What he said!!

In the end, the government shows it is willing to spend billions on inconveniencing us at airports with programs with security holes big enough to sail the Titanic through. But when it comes to the relatively cheap matter of building a simple fence which will inconvenience nobody (except those that want to break the law)….nope, we can’t do it, we don’t know where we stand.

Makes you wonder who exactly they are representing. Lately my guess starts with an “M” and rhymes with “Mexico”.

From the “Yeah, Like We Didn’t See This Coming” Department:

The Catholic Church has stepped up it’s attacks on a fictional story, that also happens to be published as fiction.

The Vatican stepped up its offensive against “The Da Vinci Code” on Friday when a top official close to
Pope Benedict blasted the book as full of anti-Christian lies and urged Catholics to boycott the film.

Alright guys, you got those big hats on a little too tight. It’s a fictional story that is full of mystery, adventure, action and suspense. It also happens to be fairly well written and lots of people have enjoyed it…even the religious ones. Did I also mention it’s fiction?

Quit getting your robes in a bunch just because someone dares to write something you don’t agree with. I bet you’ve given this book more publicity with your whining than Columbia pictures ever could.

Many of the people that are going to see this movie are those who have already read, and enjoyed, the book. Oh but as any good public relations person will tell you never forget to insult the very people who you are trying to convince to listen to you.

Amato said the book, written by Dan Brown, had been hugely successful around the world thanks in part to what he called “the extreme cultural poverty on the part of a good number of the Christian faithful.”

Excuse me?? Because I don’t have a stick up my ass and enjoyed a piece of fictional writing, I’m being accused of “extreme cultural poverty”? Tell you what. Fuck you and the church you rode in on. How is that for cultural poverty?

Wow, you’d never know it from paying attention to the news but apparently there are alot of people that aren’t happy about…well, anything. Because this weekend we have three different protests going on and that’s just here in the Twin Cities.

FRIDAY
Youth Against War and Racism is hosting a rally. Flyer is located here. Students are to walk out of class on Friday, April 28th and then show up around Noon at Northrup so they can make their voices heard. Presumably they feel someone will care.

In their words…

Last November 2nd, thousands of Twin Cities students - from over 40 schools in 16 districts - walked out to protest the war. Up to 2000 rallied and marched at the U of M, and a new youth movement was born.

Yes and look what it has accomplished. I mean you have….um…well…

Yet Congress keeps giving Bush hundreds of billions more for this corrupt war for oil and empire. Meanwhile our schools crumble,

Schools crumbling?? They f-ing better not be!! With as much as you keep sucking out of me in property taxes every year. If they are crumbling I want ever f-ing dime back.

tuition rises out of reach, living wage jobs are disappearing,

At what point did it become necessary for high school students to have a “living wage” job???

and the politicians are whipping up anti-immigrant racism to deflect the blame for these problems from themselves!

Yes, just call it racism. No need to deal with the actual issues. No need to think….like you would IF YOU WERE IN SCHOOL

Ok….so onto….

SATURDAY
MINN-SIR is hosting an immigration reform rally…that’s for people that believe breaking the law still makes you a criminal. In other words for you rational folk.

Saturday, April 29th, 2006
US Federal Courthouse, Minneapolis Building
202 US Courthouse
300 S 4th Street
Minneapolis, MN 55415

From 1:00 to 4:00 pm
Guest Speakers will be present

MONDAY

And then we have the king of all rallys, which I have already made fun ofcovered once before. There will be a national boycott on Monday by all illegal immigrants. Apparently we will discover that the country does not grind to a halt just because they got a bug up their butt because breaking the law is still considered a crime.

In any case at 3pm at Powderhorn Park in Minneapolis there will be a rally. One would assume that if the INS and ICE had any sense they would stake out this park. In any case, the rally is sponsored by the May 1st Action Committee. For more information call 612.721.1681.

Overheard today…

Girl with a cell phone growing out her ear : “Can you hear me when I roll my eyes?”

She also looked at me strange when I smashed my head against the nearest wall.

MEMO
TO : US Citizens
FROM : Department of Homeland Security
RE : Do Your Part To Fight Terrorism

As we all know, the Muslim extremists considers it a sin for a man to see a naked woman who is not his wife.

So, this Saturday at 2:00 PM Eastern time all North American women are asked to walk out of their house completely naked to help weed out any possible neighborhood terrorists.

Circling your block for two hours is recommended for this anti-terrorist effort.

All men are to position themselves in lawn chairs in front of their house to prove they are not part of a hidden Al-Qaeda cell and they think it’s okay to see other women nude and to show support for their fellow sisters.

And since Muslims also do not approve of alcohol, a cold six-pack at your side is further proof of your non-Muslim extremismist status.

The United States of America appreciates your efforts to root out terrorism and applauds your participation. Thank you for your cooperation.

So a friend of mine may be moving sometime soon. He’s indicated he has some work that needs done on his house to get it prepped to sell. Now we all know how those projects go, you start out just replacing a lightbulb in the garage and by the end of the weekend you’re working on a third stall addition.

So I guess I’m fully prepared to end up doing drywall, painting, carpeting, plumbing, roofing, yard work, framing, etc. Now I know that only illegal immigrants are capable of doing this work….I know this because the president tells me so every day.

So I’m guess I’m curious…how do I go about renouncing my citizenship?? And after I’m done doing the above jobs, how do I get my citizenship back?? Is it a form you fill out in triplicate and give it to a government bureaucrat to lose or how does that work?

Any advice would be welcome.

Sometimes a leader isn’t defined by what he says, but how he says it. A leader should inspire confidence even if he isn’t. A leader can make you believe he’s got the answers even if he doesn’t.

With that in mind let’s compare two quotes…one recently and one from awhile back

Massive deportation of the people here is unrealistic. It’s just not going to work. You can hear people out there hollering it’s going to work. It’s not going to work. It just — and so therefore, what do we do with people who are here? And this is one of the really important questions Congress is going to have to deal with.

George W. Bush

and….

All this will not be finished in the first hundred days. Nor will it be finished in the first thousand days, nor in the life of this administration, nor even perhaps in our lifetime on this planet. But let us begin.

John F. Kennedy

Now I ask you…which one sounds more presidential?? On the basis of those quotes, which one of these presidents inspires you to action?

Once again, I’d like to let you all know about an upcoming rally. It would be nice to see alot of people turn out for this…especially those that are actually legally able to be here and vote and such. If you’re pissed off at how the government has turned illegal immigration into a giant clusterfuck (new technical term) then this is your event.

Show up and make your voices heard.

Minnesotans Seeking Immigration Reform are hosting a rally at the US Federal Court Building. This rally is for those that are opposed to illegal immigration but still support legal immigration…so in other words most senseable people. The info is as follows:

Saturday, April 29th, 2006

US Federal Courthouse, Minneapolis Building

202 US Courthouse

300 S 4th Street

Minneapolis, MN 55415

From 1:00 to 4:00 pm

Guest Speakers will be present

You can find the full flyer here. Come out and make your voice heard! Because sure as hell those that don’t even have a legal right to be here are.

This contest is a special one. Thanks to my victory in the photoshop contest, this one will have an actual prize associated with it. A copy of Hugh Hewitt’s new book! Let it begin!

The Rankings Are As Follows:
Triple “I Whine Like A Child” A : 4
Aelfheld : 2
Sola-Man : 2
NightWriter : 2
Mall Diva : 2
Dan S : 2
Bobby_B : 1
Harvey : 1
spurringirl : 1

For this contest you get to make up your own answers!! That’s right…just pretend you’re a real life journalist and just make shit up. Post answers in the comments. They will be judged on creativity, plausibility and humor.

Question : What’s this guy got on his mind???

Difficulty : You can’t use the obvious pun in your answer.

Past Contests:
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11, Part 12, Part 13, Part 14

A major research institution has recently announced the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element has been named “Governmentium”. Governmentium has 1 neutron, 12 deputy neutrons, 75 assistant neutrons, and 224 deputy assistant neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. A minute amount of governmentium causes a reaction to take 4 days to complete when it would normally take less than a second. It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.

In fact, governmentium’s mass will actually increase over time since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.

Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a certain quantity in concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as “Critical Morass”. When catalyzed with money, governmentium becomes administratium, an element that radiates just as much energy as governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.